Like most days, I woke up this morning from a very deep and dissatisfying sleep, readied myself for the day and boarded my train bound for the office. A commuter next to me offered me his cornbread, but I declined for obvious hygiene reasons.
Midway through the journey, a bizarre sequence of elaborate garbled sounds were broadcast over the train's intercom that turned out to be a message from the driver, which naturally, no one could interpret except for a mother sat further down the carriage. The mother was able to decipher part of the transmission - the train was being diverted to an unknown location for some reason, thus severely holding up everyone's day.
I'll spare you the details of the rest of the journey, but basically, a rampant ticket inspector made of polarised silicon boarded the train at Blackheath, was a little bit curt with everyone, pandemonium ensued, several passengers died, one tried to feed me his magazine so I hit him until he spilt his tea everywhere and milk seemed to pour out of him for ages, and eventually it all got too much for me, so I shoved the ticket inspector into a toilet cubicle and flushed him.
This all happened whilst I was wearing this donated T-shirt from Mike at Nottingham-based Last Exit To Nowhere; a fantastic T-shirt retailer specialising in movie-based designs.
What I like about Last Exit To Nowhere is that they side-step the perils of Hollywood copyright warfare but selling tees that don't reference blockbusters directly, but rather nod towards significant elements within the plot or backdrop. In this instance, I am wearing a standard issue Nostromo branded T-shirt - flight wear for crew members manning the cargo ship from the 1979 film Alien, which if memory serves, is a film with a plot not unlike my adventure this morning.
See more from Last Exit To Nowhere via their Twitter Account
