Merry Christmas T-shirt fans!
If you’re reading this THREEHUNDREDANDSIXTEEFIVE T-shirt challenge post on the date it was published, I predict you are doing so as the result of one of the following three scenarios:
1) You’ve been hit by the first Christmas Day lull. You awoke with all the excitement of a box of crickets being accidentally dropped in a busy pet shop, torn open your presents in a whirlwind of shredded paper, and then realised that you can’t really do anything with the gifts you received because they are predominantly chocolate (you can’t justify eating an entire tube of Maltesers before breakfast), cash (there is absolutely nothing you can buy from anywhere today), or fancy soaps (which you will never ever use). Furthermore, there are several hours between now and your Mother’s splendid feast being served, so all that’s left for you to do is browse the Internet on your phone to combat the come-down...
2) You’ve been hit by the second Christmas Day lull. Dinner was delicious and although you had to massage your throat to get the last mouthful down, you ladled a couple of rounds of dessert over your face as well. Barely conscious and drooling on the sofa lit only by the Christmas tree lights now that the daylight has diminished, you observe that every man, woman and beast around you is in a food coma, leaving you with absolutely no one to talk to and nothing to talk about. All that’s left for you to do is browse the Internet on your phone to combat the boredom...
3) You don’t celebrate Christmas for reasons of outright misery. Today is a day like any other and you have showered, dressed and gone to work to find it closed. Dismayed, you’ve returned home with little else to do but perform a sundry task that you’ve been putting off, such as shaping the dust in your loft to form an image of Earth’s landmasses, all the while acknowledging the dawning realisation that you are perhaps a cold and lonely person. All that’s left for you to do is browse the Internet on your phone to combat turning to a life of dictatorship...
If you've experienced either of the first two today, take comfort from knowing you will never be as "ronery" as Trey Parker and Matt Stone's depiction of the late Kim Jong Il from the hit puppet comedy Team America, as featured on today's THREEHUNDREDANDSIXTEEFIVE T-shirt donation from IdiotGenius. You're not a tyrant, you aren't the subject of a meme-based website making a mockery of the way you look at things and you certainly aren't a puppet at the hands of the creators of South Park, so put this IdiotGenius T-shirt post to one side and go obliterate the Cadbury's Roses you lovely little person.
If you've experienced the first scenario today, well, it might be wise to not leave your house until the New Year...
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